To new beginnings

 Drumroll please! After almost three years, I finally feel like I have something to say. Something to write about and throw into this fierce world of new-age blogs and mantras. I don't propose it's going to be huge. I however do feel massively at peace for finally having found my voice. What has happened in the interim? You may or may not find out later. For now, I just want to embrace my foray back into this world. Let the writing begin! Cheers!

Lost & found

“Gone. The saddest word in the language. In any language.” 
― Mark Slouka, God's Fool

How do you feel when you lose?

How do you feel when you lose your most treasured thing? A precious dainty lil' earring, that favorite black kohl you can't leave home without, the new bag you've been showing off to all your friends or the ring that is a gift from a special someone?

How do you feel when you break?

How do you feel when you break a prized possession? Your favorite shoes with those lady gaga heels, the chain on your fabulous new purse, the exquisite belt that was just right to wear with everything in your wardrobe?

Do you rush to replace the lost and broken as easily as picking today's morning paper instead of yesterday's? Or do you pout, scream, throw a tantrum and just can't imagine how you can ever find anything else to fill the newly created empty spot in your life?

I've recently come to this conclusion that our reaction to any loss is proportional to the value we place on it - which is not necessarily the same as what others have. Our path towards either indifference or despair depends upon our degree of attachment with said object. And we all know what the worst losses are - losing a loved one. Whether it's a heartbreak, separation or divorce - if you are attached enough, there is no end to your sorrow. Your world turns gray and damp and there is no escaping the torment of what-ifs' and maybes'. 'Course some losses are truly irreplaceable. Death - our most feared enemy - wrenches everything we've created and worked for away from us, in one tiny moment.

So how do you feel when something you lost turns up unexpectedly one fine day? There was a time when you had tried hard to pin it down, disappointed when you were unable to - you had mourned its loss, eventually coming to terms with the fact that you'll never see it again. Do you feel like it doesn't matter anymore - you have truly moved on? Or do you jump up with joy in anticipation of the new-found possibilities, because as crazy as it sounds, you were still holding onto that tiny little hope in your heart - that one day when it shows up, things will go back to how they were?

The truth is, there is no telling if & when that precious something will pop up in your life again. And even if it does eventually, you may be surprised to realize you had been secretly wishing it never did. Because when it surfaces, it comes tethered with the possibility that you might lose it - all over again. And sometimes, one loss is enough to cause a lifetime of mourning.